Our Trip to Brazil: A Reflection

I have worked for Maryknoll Lay Missioners for over 23 years. Almost from the beginning I have wanted to go see the missioners where they worked, but I couldn't afford to go.

Personally, however, it remained very important to me, more so as the years went on. So now, on the verge of retirement,  I can finally afford to go. I planned for months, and I talked about it with my close friend Marci. She said, "This is more important to you then the Camino, isn't it?"

 

I knew she was right. The Camino had been a powerful experience, but it was up to me to derive the meaning from it. There was no direct connection to my life. This pilgrimage, to Brazil, was deeply personal. I came to MKLM to do meaningful work that would make the world in some small way a better place. My job was part of that, but indirectly. I would meet the missioners and hear stories about their work, but I longed for direct exposure. Now I would finally make the journey with Mary by my side to see what all my efforts had been supporting. Was I helping to make the world a better place?

 

We spent about 9 days in Brazil from October 14th to October 22nd, and the whole time I felt like I was in Heaven. As I reflect on those days, the thing that strikes me the most was the kindness and generosity of the missioners who basically took care of us while we were with them. They welcomed us into their world and helped us see what they were doing there.

It is very difficult to find people in Brazil that speak English. I thought that people who worked at hotels and restaurants would speak English. This was true to some extent in Rio, but not in Sao Paulo, Joao Passoa or Olinda. The few who spoke English didn't speak it very well. It led to some comical situations. I called the front desk to say there was a problem with the television. The clerk asked, "Do you want two?"  That puzzled me, two televisions? When help arrived, it was an employee carrying two towels. Fortunately, he knew how to fix the television.

The missioners were always going above and beyond in helping us with the language hurdle. When we first arrived in Sao Paulo, Joanne spoke to the clerk about checking us in early. She resisted, as the lobby was filled with people waiting to get into their rooms (it was a holiday weekend). Joanne pointed out Mary and told the clerk that Mary wasn’t feeling well and really needed to lie down (Mary was actually just tired from the 9 hour flight). The clerk checked us in, and the manager cut the early check-in fee in half.

After spending the day with Margarita at the favela where she worked, she took us to our hotel, and then she came in to speak to the desk clerk because we were having problems with our Wifi (critical in keeping contact with the missioners). When they told us we would have to move to another floor, Margarita came up to our room and helped us pack and move our belongings to the 12^th floor. When she left, she asked us if we needed anything else or if she could do anything else for us (the standard parting from all the missioners in Sao Paulo).

We kept Kathy busy in Joao Pessoa with arranging our day trips for us (not that we asked her to). We wanted to go to Olinda (a very scenic town overlooking the Atlantic Ocean), which was a two-hour drive from Joao Pessoa. She contacted Franciso at our hotel to find us a driver. He found one, but once the driver found out we didn’t speak Portuguese he refused to take us. More phone calls and bargaining from Kathy.

Eventually, Francisco, who had the day off, drove us back and forth for a six hour day trip. We all had lunch together at a restaurant Kathy had chosen, which had an incredible dish featuring fish in a cream sauce baked in a pumpkin. We ate the pumpkin as well as the fish, and we needed three people to finish the dish. Franciso also drove us to the Mirante Skybeach to see the sunset from the tallest building in Joao Pessoa, again thanks to Kathy’s work.

And it wasn’t just the missioners who treated us with the utmost kindness and generosity. A small woman with glasses was our waitress at the daily breakfast buffet at the hotel in Joao Pessoa. We would fill up our plates at the buffet, and as long as we were seated she would come by with other plates of food for us to try. With the help of my Google translator, I told her that everything was delicious, and her face lit up as she pulled me by the arm over to the omelet chef to let her know what I had said. The next two days she would rush over whenever she saw us and continue to bring us plates of food. When we left after our last breakfast, I wrote her a message on my translator: “Today is our last day. We just wanted to thank you for your kindness to us. You brought joy to us each morning. Richard & Mary.” She grabbed my phone and wrote the following: “I call myself Andrea. You two guys have been a prayer to me.” The translation could have been better, but we got the message. She shook my hand and Mary gave her a big hug.

There are more stories I could tell, so many kind and loving gestures from the missioners and others we met. I believe God has called on us to love each other and help each other.

 “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor? … The one who had mercy on him.” Luke 10: 36, 37

That’s what I received through this trip, a feeling of being loved and that there were people looking after us. If we all treated each other this way, what a wonderful community we would be.  

 

Break Bread With Me

A friend of mine once referred to my often garish, colorful or humorous ties as a ministry, because strangers have often commented on how they liked my ties, and one even asked if he could take a picture of my tie. I believe that anything we might do, no matter how seemingly small, can be considered a ministry if it has a positive impact on others.

So I have embarked on a practice that I had enjoyed in the past, but was negatively impacted by the pandemic, but one I am finally re-instituting: Having lunch with people. In the years I have worked at Maryknoll, I have enjoyed in particular taking visiting missioners out for lunch over the years and also with coworkers. A perfect lunch for me is with one other person or a couple. Large company lunches can be fun, but not rewarding in the way a one-on-one lunch is. The latter lunch always holds the possibility of a curtain pulled aside: learning something interesting about someone you otherwise would never have known. At our office prayer group, we recently spent a session discussing the passage in Luke about the resurrected Jesus encountering two of his followers on the road to Emmaus. They don't recognize him at first.

 

As they came near the village to which they were going, Jesus acted as if he were going farther; but they held him back, saying, "Stay with us; the day is almost over and it is getting dark." So he went in to stay with them. He sat down to eat with them, took the bread, and said the blessing; then he broke the bread and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him, but he disappeared from their sight. They said to each other, "Wasn't it like a fire burning in us when he talked to us on the road and explained the Scriptures to us?" --Luke 14:28-32

This passage resonated with me instantly. The fact that the two men's eyes are opened at the breaking of the bread only further demonstrates that meals together are an effective method of discovering the spirit within us. Then they have joy in remembering the conversation they had with Jesus on the road. If we are open to seeing it, we can find Jesus in each other simply by breaking bread together. As a contemplative, I believe that Jesus resides in all of us, and we can see him if we dare to look close enough. So the more people I have lunch with the more I see Jesus.

So while I started having regular lunches with people again merely because I enjoyed them, I suddenly realized that these lunches could potentially be another sort of ministry, albeit a selfish one. I began considering who would I like to have lunch with that I haven't ever before or in a long time. I took my priest of many years out to lunch, after having wanted to, but never quite putting it together. I had lunch with a person who worked at Maryknoll for many years, but not directly with me. I had lunch with one of the professors I felt close to when I got my masters at Pace University. I had lunch with a former coworker who I hadn't seen in months. Every lunch has been enjoyable and rewarding. And my meal partners seem to be enjoying them as well. One said that she would be willing to have lunch with me every month, and I just might take her up on it.

Some people even asked me to have lunch with them. One friend just happened to be in town and gave me a call. So perhaps God approves and is working to expand my ministry, if I can call it that.

I use to have lunch with my dear friend Joe about once a week in the years we worked together. He had a tremendous impact on me, spiritually and otherwise, and each lunch gave me another piece of him and a chance to share another piece of me with him. Now that he's passed, one of my favorite memories of him are the lunches we had together. Also my former priest Father Larry. We had many lunches and dinners together, sometimes with my Mary along, and the conversations we had were always far-reaching, intriguing and joyful. These continued after his retirement and only ended after his passing.

I am retiring in a year, and I plan on putting together as many lunches together as I can. Let me know if you are in the area and would like to have lunch with me. I would love to have lunch with you!